by John | Sep 18, 2011 | Uncategorized
Years ago, my wife and I went to break the big news to her parents: They were going to become grandparents for the first time.
To my astonishment, my overjoyed mother-in-law ignored my wife. Instead she hugged me and gushed, “Oh thank you, John!”
My response?
“Hey! My pleasure!”
↓ TranscriptMAN: Having kids will be easy! We'll split all the work!
WOMAN: Great! You give birth first! I'll go second!
Art by Vince Colletta Studio
by John | Sep 15, 2011 | Uncategorized
Last Kiss Honeymoon Disaster Insurance now available!
If all of your unrealistic dreams don’t come true (Finally an orgasm!), we’ll send you a replacement spouse and as many Mai Tais (paper umbrellas extra) as you can drink before passing out.
Be safe! Send a bucket of money (No pennies!) to
Last Kiss Department of Broken Dreams
P.O. Box 0000 1/2
Big Scam, OK 66666
↓ TranscriptMAN: Wow! This is a first! None of my other wives wanted a divorce...until after our honeymoon!
Art by Vince Colletta Studio
by John | Sep 13, 2011 | Uncategorized
Extra credit assignment: Don’t get pregnant!
↓ TranscriptWOMAN (to students): No drinking or sex in class! use the parking lot…like everyone else!
Art by Charles Nicholas and Sal Trapani
by John | Sep 11, 2011 | Uncategorized
↓ TranscriptWOMAN: Does this closeup make me look fat?
Art by Vince Colletta Studio
by John | Sep 10, 2011 | Uncategorized
I don’t know if I was the first person to compare the 9-11 rescuers to superheroes. But I know for certain that I wasn’t the last. It was a popular theme in all the tributes that appeared in the coming months–especially for those of us working in the comics field.
↓ TranscriptCAPTION: Sept. 9, 2001: Bored, billionaire playboy Wayne Bruce is alarmed when he turns on his 3,200-inch TV and his favorite cartoon show, has been pre-empted by ...
WAYNE BRUCE: …a terrorist attack? Why aren’t Captain U.S.A. and Princess Amazon protecting us?
WOMAN: Because they’re just cartoon characters, Mr. Bruce!
WAYNE BRUCE: Gulp! Don’t we have any real super-heroes?
WOMAN: look at the TV! People are risking their lives to save others! If
they’re not superheroes...who are?
CAPTION: Dedicated to the 9-11 Rescue Workers
CAPTION: Originally presented in Comics Buyer’s Guide--Sept . 2001
