Last Kiss is over 100 (in Germany)

Last Kiss has been appearing in Germany since late last year and last week we passed a bit of a landmark: over 100 Last Kiss strips have now been translated into German.

Why German?

Well, I’ve been writing Disney comics for over 20 years and Disney comics are still very popular in Europe. So my name was known there even before I started Last Kiss.

One German site even devoted a whole page to my life and work. The site’s owners (Gerd Syllwasschy and Peter Kowalewski) eventually became big fans of Last Kiss and…well, suddenly I’m in German–three times a week!

My thanks to Gerd, Peter, Joachim Stahl, Constanze Maier, and the other translators for making me (possibly) funnier than I am in English!

Widow Part 1

Widow Part 1

Click on image to see spectacularly larger view of today’s comic.

I love doing single-panel gags. Good, quick punch lines are a joy—if not forever then at least a couple of seconds.

But I also enjoy writing actual stories. And few stories have brought me as much pleasure as “Widow Miss Muffet.” Mainly because it gave me a chance to work with Dick Giordano.

For quite awhile now, I’d been thinking of serializing one of my comic book stories on the web. But which story? After Dick passed away on March 27, I realized that “Widow” had to be the story.

Dick Giordano helped make Last Kiss possible. He was there from the start–although I wouldn’t meet him until years later.

The first Last Kiss gag I ever wrote featured romance art by Dick. All of my Last Kiss comic books have had Giordano covers. And I’ve recycled Dick’s old art (to his great amusement) for countless snarky Last Kiss gags.

In addition, Dick (when asked) was generous with valuable info about comics, artists and (Gasp!) life itself. And—to top it all off—he agreed to draw “Widow” for me.

Unfortunately, it was the only time we ever worked on a story together.

So enjoy. Subsequent episodes will be smaller. But they’ll be often. In fact, the next one is tomorrow!

Love & Last Kisses,

Sprechen Sie Deutsch? To read this comic in German click here.

↓ Transcript
PANEL 1-SCENE: An attractive, middle-aged woman (Auntie Maim) is talking to a little girl (Muffet) who turns out to be her niece. As Maim talks, we see a scene from her past in the background. It's Maim as a young woman being carried off by a bare-chested South Seas native.

CAPTION: "My Auntie Maim had the perfect life! She married an elderly tycoon who died during their honeymoon from what Auntie said was...'An overdose of happiness!' Afterwards, Auntie bravely carried on...partying and traveling all over the world! And she always had the most amazing adventures!"

MAIM: and, instead of sacrificing me to the volcano, the chief carried me off to his hut where we...uh, played a special sort of wrestling game for adults!

MUFFET: Gosh, Auntie! Did he pin you?

PANEL 2-SCENE: Maim leans in close to Muffet.

MAIM: Baby, I got pinned more often than a cheerleader at a frat party!


PANEL 3-SCENE: Cut to Muffet all dressed up in oversized adult woman's clothes, pretending she's getting married to her stuffed animal (rabbit), Mr. Fluffy.

CAPTION: "I wanted to be just like Auntie Maim! when I grew up I was going to marry an old codger with a sick heart and a Healthy bank account!"

MUFFET: I now pronounce us, husband and wife!

PANEL 4, SCENE: Cut to a shallow grave where Mr. Fluffy is apparently buried. (We can see his ears sticking out above ground.) Muffet is crying.

Beluvved husband of Mitzi Muffet!

STORY TITLE: Widow Miss Muffet

CREDITS: Script by John Lustig, Art by Dick Giordano

MUFFET: Goodbye, Mr. Fluffy! At a time like this (Sniff!) there’s only one thing to do!

PANEL 5, SCENE: Cut to close up of Muffet, crying, but smiling.

MUFFET: I'm going to Disneyland!

Are Comics Fattening?

Are Comics Fattening?

This is the second of two Last Kiss comics that’ll appear in the “food” issue of the new Slam Bang anthology that debuts April 24, 2010 at the Small Press and Alternative Comics Expo (S.P.A.C.E.) I won’t be there, but Slam Bang publisher (and Last Kiss colorist) Allen Freeman will be selling Slam Bang at his table. Drop by, tell him you’re a Last Kiss fan, and get a free Last Kiss note card.

Sprechen Sie Deutsch? To read this comic in German click here.

↓ Transcript
SCENE: A waiter in a small diner talks to a young woman at her as she sits at the restaurant counter.

CAPTION: I was born in Comicstown! But I craved real literature! I yearned for Tolstoyville! Hemingway Hills! Or even Dr. Seuss City! Friends begged me to stay! They offered me Slam Bang and Last Kiss! But nothing tempted me...’til that fateful day at the Cape 'n Cowl Cafe...

WAITER: You don't read comics? Well...I'll fix that! I'll give you a free doughnut for every comic you read!

WOMAN: Give me a stack of X-Men, you fiend! And keep 'em coming!

Dog Not So Gone

Dog Not So Gone

It’s a dog’s life…if you’re lucky!

↓ Transcript
SCENE: A woman is carrying a dog. The dog looks soulfully at the readers.

CAPTION: Ralph discovers one of the good bits about being turned into a dog!

DOG: I can pee on the floor…and she still sleeps with me! How about you?

Caption ©2010 Orson Scott Card
Art & dialog ©2010 Last Kiss Inc

I Like People, But…

I Like People, But…

Sprechen Sie Deutsch? To read this comic in German click here.

↓ Transcript
WOMAN TO MAN: Sure, I like people! It's just men that I find disgusting!