Wanna read many of the world’s best comics online for free? With unlimited access going back years, sometimes even decades? You’re in luck.

On Valentine’s Day, GoComics announced that it’s giving readers 14 days of free “unlimited access to our archives!”

This is your chance to go back and enjoy modern classics like Calvin and Hobbes, Doonesbury, FoxTrot and The Boondocks, or newer hits like Last Kiss, Lio, and Cul de Sac!

Congratulations to Gordon Pyke for winning the latest Last Kiss writing contest. (See comic above.) Gordon was one of seven finalists and his submission was the clear favorite in the fan ballot.

Second Place honors went to Jeff Willis for his submission: MAN: I feel faint. WOMAN: You should put your head between my knees.

Third Place bragging rights went to Gale Grove for the following dialog: MAN (thinking): I knew that she was a real women when she opened the beer with her tongue.

The contest — featuring an opening caption by literary luminary Orson Scott Card — attracted hundreds of dialog submissions. Many were brilliant. Many were weird. And a lot were both.

In case you’re wondering, the other four finalists and their submissions were (in no particular order):

MAN: Oui, madame — Inspector Clouseau at your service… – J. Rankin

WOMAN: Jeesh, everywhere I go, men are falling for me. — Valarie Ziroli

WOMAN (thinking): …and a real idiot for believing my story about a magic tree that grows beer cans. — Chris Martin

MAN: Is this heaven? WOMAN: Not yet, but a 180 degree rotation oughta do it! – A.J. Bodnar

I know my choice of finalists raised some eyebrows. Why these? Why not others? Why are so many of them so sexual?

All I can say is that:

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