by John | Dec 10, 2009 | Uncategorized
I know I just ran a comic the other day about Fox News. (Or rather Foxy News.) But don’t worry. I’m not going to make a habit of this..
Last Kiss will always be more about wacky relationships and absurd lust than topical events and celebrities. (Hmm. If I did a Tiger Woods gag I could have both. No. No. Must resist.)
But every once in awhile I do have an opinion and occasionally it escapes into my work.
And, yes, I have a very, very low opinion of Fox News. But, I have a pretty low opinion of most TV news. I’m a former newspaper reporter. And the only way most underpaid newspaper reporters can get through the day is by telling themselves that TV reporters are overpaid bums who just report headlines, stand in front of car crashes and smile.
Of course, this is an incredibly broad over-generalization. In fact, it’s like something you’d hear on a 24-hour news broadcast…that fills its time with opinions, sensationalism and fluff.
I know…I’m ranting. Sorry. Next week we’re back to just funny. No axes will be ground. No soap boxes will be mounted. In the meantime, if you want a soap box of your own–leave a comment!
↓ TranscriptFEMALE TV REPORTER: Is Santa a socialist? Is Obama behind these holiday handouts? Details tonight on Fox News!
by John | May 8, 2009 | Uncategorized
I’ll be back to sexy silliness next week, but I’ve been having fun with mother-themed jokes this week. Why? Well, it’s probably because I recently created a zillion Mother’s Day gags for a greeting card manufacturer. So I’ve still got mom gags oozing from my veins.
But it’s also because this hasn’t been an easy year for the Mother Obviously Superior of the Lustig clan. So I’m really grateful that she’s back on her feet–and ready to correct my grammar–again. It’s been awhile. Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!
Sprechen Sie Deutsch? To read this comic in German click here.
↓ TranscriptDAUGHTER: Gosh, Mom! I just realized--you're right about everything!
MOM (thinking): I’ve dreamed of this day!
by John | May 6, 2009 | Uncategorized
Our week-long Mother’s Day celebration continues because–hey, why not? And, yes, my mother’s a superior being. Hope yours is too!
↓ TranscriptMAN: I believe there’s order in the universe...and our lives are ruled by a superior being!
WOMAN: So, you know about…Mom!
by John | May 3, 2009 | Uncategorized
We’re celebrating Mother’s Day early this week. In fact, we’re celebrating mothers all week here on Last Kiss–in all our own twisted way!
↓ TranscriptMAN (talking to crying woman): Face it! You’ll never be as good as your mom…at making people feel guilty!
WOMAN: I can try!
by John | Mar 16, 2009 | Uncategorized
Why I’m celebrating St. Patrick’s Day this year–with extra gusto:
Twenty-five years ago on St. Patrick’s Day, my wife went insane. Instead of screaming and running out of the church, she married me. So St. Pat’s Day is always a major event in our home. This year we’re celebrating a quarter century of Shelagh having a lapse in judgment and somehow being happily married to me. So far, so good
↓ TranscriptCAPTION: Breakfast Cereal Theater presents: Leprechaun Love -- a tale of sugar-coated romance!
WOMAN (EMBRACING MAN): You’re always after me lucky charms!
MAN (EMBRACING WOMAN): they’re magically delicious!
