Milk Thief
I’m not sure where this gag originated (it’s on multiple sites), but it seemed like a nice companion to today’s Last Kiss milk comic.
Beware of the Van Burens!
Original art by Vince Colletta Studio from First Kiss #11, 1959.
You see, David, the Van Burens used to live here. But—good friends with your parents?
I don’t think so!
Why? Well, David, the Van Burens were secretly communist vampires! (And terrorists too!) Sent from another galaxy (and the future) to kidnap unsuspecting capitalist patriots like your parents.
God knows what those evil, atheist aliens would’ve demanded in return for your parents. (Our best theory is that they would’ve insisted that everyone in America be forced to have free healthcare—in Canada!)
Fortunately, we at the F.B.I. (Formidable Bureau of Insanity) stopped them!
Meanwhile, back in the present…
See the spiffed-up, new version of this art with new, funny dialogue in today’s Last Kiss Comic.
Last Kiss Escorts: Free Snake Killing With Every Date
Artist unknown. Originally appeared in First Kiss #17, 1960. Click on art to enlarge.
Are you afraid of men, snakes and other phallic symbols?
Of course you are!
That’s why Last Kiss Dating guarantees that all of its escorts have at least 15 minutes of training in crucial skills such as:
—How to kill snakes with a crowbar!
—How to remember to…always carry a crowbar!
—How not to get women pregnant!
—How to deliver a baby…while killing a snake!
—Hot to deliver a baby with a crowbar!
Meanwhile, back in the present…
See the spiffed-up, new version of this art with new, funny dialogue in today’s Last Kiss Comic.
Secret Sex Tape?
Art by my hero (really) Dick Giordano from First Kiss #7, 1959. Click art to enlarge.
This is why you should always keep a suitcase packed after you get drunk and have sex with a fraternity. Thanks to the Internet (and your ex-boyfriend’s iPhone) you could become an Internet porn star overnight.
When that happens—and it’s only a matter of time, Sweetie—you’re going to want to get out of town…fast! Unless, or course, you’re already in Hollywood. Then call your agent.
Meanwhile, back in the present…
See the spiffed-up, new version of the art with new, funny dialogue in today’s Last Kiss Comic.
Faking a Boyfriend
Original art by Vince Colletta Studio in First Kiss #8, 1959. Click art to enlarge.
Ladies, don’t you just hate it when you have to trick people into thinking you have a love life that doesn’t require batteries? Fortunately, Don is available. And he doesn’t require electricity—although an occasional little blue pill might come in handy.
Meanwhile, back in the present…
See the spiffed-up, new version of the art with new, funny dialogue in today’s Last Kiss Comic.
Tell Some Other Men—While I Run Away
Art by Lou Fine from Smash #26, 1941.
I’d stick around and hunt for the shooter, but I’ve got an important story to write. And flower show reviews don’t write themselves—although wouldn’t it be nice if they did?
Meanwhile, back in the present…
See the spiffed-up, new version of the art with new, funny dialogue in today’s Last Kiss Comic.
Waiting for My Dream Man
Artist unknown. Art from First Kiss #19, 1961.
What will my dream man look like?
More importantly, will he be single and filthy rich? Or just filthy and rich?
Will I have to get out of bed to meet him? Is it too soon to plan the honeymoon?
Meanwhile, back in the present…
See the spiffed-up, new version of the art with new, funny dialogue in today’s Last Kiss Comic.
The Last Kiss News Team
Art by Reed Crandall from Smash #25, 1941.
Breaking news from 1941:
Facebook Still Not Invented Yet; Millions Mourn! Cat Photos Useless!
Meanwhile, back in the present…
See the spiffed-up, new version of the art in today’s Last Kiss Comic: “Fang You Very Much”
Old Yeller Bites Again
Original art by Charles Nicholas from NURSE BETSY CRANE #13, 1961. Click art to enlarge.
Meanwhile, back in the present…
See the spiffed-up, new version of the art in today’s Last Kiss Comic: “Dead Right, Nurse”
She Wanted More, But…
Art by Charles Nicholas and Sal Trapani from First Kiss #1, 1957.
She wanted Moore, but she got Les.
Meanwhile, back in the present…
See the spiffed-up, new version of the art in today’s Last Kiss Comic: “I Didn’t Sleep with Your Sister.”
