This is the second of two Christmas gags written by my pal Jennifer M. Contino–the self-pronounced “Queen of Christmas comics.” (Even Santa doesn’t have as many Christmas-themed comic books as her!)

Original Vintage Art & Text

Art by Bill Ward from the story “Rapture at Homecoming Time” in Diary Loves #8, March 1951. Quality Comics. The story begins on Page #12.

Curious to see more? Click the link above to read the entire vintage comic book for free on

↓ Transcript
SCENE: Distraught woman wearing long-armed opera gloves has one to her forehead and is lost in thought.

MUSIC PLAYING IN BACKGROUND: “On the Fifth Day of Christmas, my true love sent to me…”

WOMAN (thinking): I dated all the Lords, Drummers and Pipers! But didn’t get even one golden ring...let alone five!

1951 Art: Bill Ward Color: Diego Jourdan Pereira & Mike Pascale
Writer: Jennifer M. Contino