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↓ Transcript
SCENE: Man at a tropical hotel.

CAPTION: Are you too depressed to think straight?

CAPTION: Too rich to spend all your money?

CAPTION: Too gullible to stop reading now?

CAPTION: Then Last Kiss To Go is the vacation company you’ve been waiting for!

CAPTION: We guarantee we’ll keep your money whether you’re happy or not!

MAN: I’m still depressed,
but spending a fortune to come here was worth it!

MAN (again): Now I’ve got a tan!

Art by Charles Nicholas and Sal Trapani