First Date? Fabulous!

First Date? Fabulous!

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SCENE: Man and woman outside eating hot dogs.

WOMAN: Fancy Date! So what’d it be
like if you weren’t trying to impress me?

MAN: You'd pay!

Art by Vince Colletta

The Hair Apparent

The Hair Apparent

Happy Father’s Day!

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SCENE: Woman holding a bald baby.

WOMAN: Sure, you’re the father! Look! Same hairline!

Art by Vince Colletta Studio

Too Happy To Be A Star

Too Happy To Be A Star

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MAN to WOMAN: But we can’t be happy! Happy people aren’t reality TV stars!

Art by Vince Colletta Studio

Royal Wedding

Royal Wedding

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SCENE: A car is driving off with a "Just Married" sign on the rear. A young boy and girl are watching it leave.

BOY: So that’s a royal wedding?

GIRL: Must be! One of those guys is a queen!

(Art--I think--by Vince Colletta Studio with additional drawing by Allen Freeman.)

The Hangover, Part 3?

The Hangover, Part 3?

Weddings are all about the bride.

If you’re the bride, people will tell you it’s “your day.” (If you’re the groom–congrats. But it’s still her day.)

Of course, it’s usually good if the groom shows up too. But your duties as a groom are minimal. Show up and stay conscious long enough to mumble “I do.”

There. You’re done. Simple.

(Guys, I absolutely guarantee that this is the single easiest chore of your entire married life. Never again will you be praised so much for doing so little.)

On the other hand, if you’re the bride–you’re in charge of everything: Cake. Music. Weather. Earthquakes. Nasal hairs. Outbreaks of acne. You get the credit–or the blame.

True story: I only remember two things from my college photography class.

–#1 Never rub your eyes when you’re working with developer. (Or, in my case, never do it again!)

–#2 Shoot the bride. A lot. If the groom wanders into some of the photos–fine. But mostly…shoot the bride.

↓ Transcript
WOMAN: Sure! I remember the wedding! But remind me anyway! Who’d I marry?