Or send me money and I’ll e-mail you my “dynamic tension” exercise secrets. Free delusions of grandeur with every purchase!
Click to enlarge.
SCENE: Man and woman on beach.
Man: We just met! You can’t hate me yet!
WOMAN: Wanna bet?
Dear Mr. Last Kiss:
I’m tired of having the girls I stalk kick sand in my face. How can I get super powers and prove my manhood by wearing a tight, revealing
Broken Bones, CA
Gaining superpowers is easy. All you need is a freak lab accident, an ancient Indian curse, or a radioactive
critter eager to bite you.
(Try dipping the family cat in one of those leaking vats down at the nuclear plant. It always works for me!)
With luck, you’ll be feeling super before the bandages even come off!
Art: Luis Dominguez Color: Allen Freeman
©2013 Last Kiss Inc
There are actually two versions of the original art. Here’s the art is as it appeared on the splash page of “The End of Summer” in First Kiss #34 (drawn by the Vince Colletta Studio):
Click image to enlarge.
And here it is—slightly repositioned and reworked by Dick Giordano—for use on the issue’s cover:
Click image to enlarge.
To save time—and especially money—Charlton Comics often used elements of the interior art for its covers.
SCENE: Woman tearfully watches as her husband and her mom walk on the back with their arms around each other.
WOMAN (thinking): Maybe taking mom on our honeymoon was a mistake!
Art: Vince Colletta Studio & Dick Giordano
Color: Allen Freeman
On sale today–through eternity! Stock up now and save!!
(See another Last Kiss comic about the BP oil spill here.)
SCENE: In the background, a vendor on the beach is selling something that looks like popsicles. In the foreground, a man and woman (both wearing bathing suites) look at the vendor and talk.
VENDOR: Cool down and clean up the Gulf! Enjoy a delicious, nutrient-free...Oilsicle!®
WOMAN: Only a moron would fall for...
MAN (next to her): Oh, boy! I want mine with extra crude!
CAPTION (below the comic): Oilsicles!® Made fresh from new oil that washes ashore every day! Hmm hmm good!
By “completely safe” I mean, of course…that it’s safe if you don’t mind getting sick. Other minor side effects include death. Other than that, no problems.
See my second comic about the BP oil disaster here!
SCENE: A man and woman are on the beach, running barefoot towards the water.
WOMAN: The water’s full of oil! we’ll be covered
MAN: Yup! it’s natural sunblock! And completely safe...unless the ocean catches on fire!
CAPTION/TAG LINE (below art): bp! Free sunblock forever…because we care!
Hey, anyone who’s a parent is really a superhero, right?
SCENE: A mom and dad at home with their young daughter.
CAPTION: Dr. Hugo Mania and Prof. Mary Shrinkhead (AKA Major Ego and Captain Id) were as happy as two superheroes could be! But then they got married and soon they were facing their toughest challenge…raising a child!
MAJOR EGO: Let’s take Suzy with us on our crime patrol!
CAPTAIN ID: She can carry a laser cannon! We’ll call her Super Ego…the tiny tot of Freudian Justice!
SUZY: But I want to go to the beach!
SCENE: SCENE: Scene shifts to family in bathing suits at the beach.
CAPTION: Holy Dr. Spock! What a dilemma! Pummeling criminals (until they admit their self-destructive tendencies) or spending "quality time" at the beach! What will they choose?
CAPTAIN ID: Well…I suppose we can fight crime here instead!
MAJOR EGO: Sure! Evil mutant surfers are bound to show up!
SUZY: Lord! I just pray I was adopted!