Poems for Girls with Runny Noses

Original art by the Vince Colletta Studio in First Kiss #36, 1964.

Original art by the Vince Colletta Studio in First Kiss #36, 1964.

Really? No poetry? Just because of the sniffles?

My friends, this injustice must be corrected. Women with sniffles need great, uplifting poetry too. Alas, all I could manage was this:

Bonnie was a lassie,
Always perfect. Never gassy.
But then—alas! She caught a cold!
Her suitors fled. Not one was bold!
All in fact—Bonnie sniffled sadly—were “just not classy!”

Meanwhile, back in the present…
See the revamped version of this art and with new, funny dialogue in today’s Last Kiss Comic.

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  1. I’m starting to get snot/cold rhymes from readers. Here’s a short verse by my pal Kevin Boze:
    Though my sex life is usually sunny
    Guys retreat when my nose is all runny
    They say, “Don’t rebuke us!
    We’re just turned off by mucus!”
    A scene more depressing than funny

  2. More cold rhymes. This time by Ogden Nash (sent to me by Tom Poston.)
    In spite of her sniffle,
    Isabel’s chiffle.
    Some girls with a sniffle
    Would be weepy and tiffle;
    They would look awful,
    Like a rained-on waffle,
    But Isabel’s chiffle
    In spite of her sniffle.
    Her nose is more red
    With a cold in her head,
    But then, to be sure,
    Her eyes are bluer.
    Some girls with a snuffle,
    Their tempers are uffle,
    But when Isabel’s snivelly
    She’s snivelly civilly,
    And when she’s snuffly
    She’s perfectly luffly.

  3. Here’s a cold poem that a reader “Norm” tells me he heard as a kid:
    When you go to kiss your Honey,
    But her nose is cold and runny,
    Well then, don’t you think it’s funny,
    ‘Cause it’s snot.


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