Clean Living Gets Smudged

Filthy rich? Sounds good. But right now I think a lot of us would settle for something more modest.

Like being filthy able-to-afford-a-pizza-on-Saturday-night. Or maybe even just filthy able-to-pay-the-bills-without-hocking-Grandma’s-dentures.

↓ Transcript
WELL-DRESSED WOMAN TO MAN AS THEY COME OUT OF NIGHT CLUB: I like good, clean living! But I’ll settle for filthy rich!

Leprechaun Love

Why I’m celebrating St. Patrick’s Day this year–with extra gusto:

Twenty-five years ago on St. Patrick’s Day, my wife went insane. Instead of screaming and running out of the church, she married me. So St. Pat’s Day is always a major event in our home. This year we’re celebrating a quarter century of Shelagh having a lapse in judgment and somehow being happily married to me. So far, so good

↓ Transcript
CAPTION: Breakfast Cereal Theater presents: Leprechaun Love -- a tale of sugar-coated romance!

WOMAN (EMBRACING MAN): You’re always after me lucky charms!

MAN (EMBRACING WOMAN): they’re magically delicious!

Not-so-high finance

I’ve been looking for an excuse to use this comic for a long time and here it is. Lucky Friday the 13th. Let’s chase the gloom away with a disaster comic. If you can laugh about the economy, it’s not that bad, right? Sure…

↓ Transcript
CAPTION: If the economy was a plane flight…

PILOT ON INTERCOM: …you may experience mild turbulence!

STEWARDESS: …Free barf bags for everyone!

PASSENGER: Is it too late to call my broker?

Watchmen Part2

Grr. I still haven’t seen the movie yet. I’ve been short on time and dealing with a neck/back problem that’s going to make sitting in a theater for a three-hour movie a test of endurance. So what’s the verdict, folks? Is the movie a masterpiece worth seeing? Or a pain in the neck?

↓ Transcript
CAPTION #1: Who watches the Watchmen? People like you!

CAPTION #2: People who know how to prioritize!

MAN SEATED IN MOVIE THEATER: oh no! My doctor just texted me! my lab results show I…

WOMAN SEATED BESIDE HIM WATCHING MOVIE: Shh! I can’t hear...the explosions and screams for mercy!

CAPTION 3: People who know enough…is never enough!

MAN: We’ve watched it 12 times! Can we go home now...and pretend our marriage still has a chance?

WOMAN: Thirteen’s my lucky number!

Watchmen Part 1

This is the first of two comics about going to see THE WATCHMEN. I have to admit that I haven’t actually seen the movie myself. But I almost feel like I have. Everybody seems to be talking about it. Reviews are mixed–from disappointing to outstanding. Oddly enough, the biggest complaint about it seems to be that it sticks “too closely” to the graphic novel and doesn’t bring anything new (besides sound, action and special effects) to the story. We’ll see…

↓ Transcript
CAPTION #1: Who watches the Watchmen? People like you!

CAPTION #2: Smart people!

MAN BUYING MOVIE TICKET AT BOOTH: Sure, sweetie! I qualify for a student discount! I’m getting a B.A. in B.S. at Befuddled U!

CAPTION #3: People who plan ahead for a long, long movie!

WOMAN TO DATE: I’m getting in line for the Ladies Room now! By the time I get in…I may actually need to go!