Sex is a Fantasy

This one’s for my wife Shelagh—an eternal optimist. (In short, a Seattle Mariner’s fan.)

What? You thought I was the baseball fan in the family? Not likely!

But—for Shelagh’s sake—Go Mariners!

Original art and text from First Kiss #20, 1961,

↓ Transcript
SCENE: Woman crying.

WOMAN: “Fantasy baseball?” Oh,
%#@&! I thought he wanted “Fantasy sex!”

Art by Vince Colletta Studio Color by Allen Freeman

©2013 Last Kiss Inc
20.1.3.1

Bottoms Up for Donald Duck

Click image to enlarge.

Now, here’s something you wouldn’t see in an American comic book for kids.

Although this may look like an audition for Last Kiss cheerleaders, it’s actually an ad in a Danish Donald Duck comic book.

This full-page ad appeared in the Oct. 13, 2005 edition of ANDERS And & Co. It’s promoting a movie af banen! (We are the Champions) about a divorced dad who takes over the coaching of his son’s little league soccer team—thus reconnecting with his son. (And earning the love of one of the soccer moms.)

Judging from this photo, he’s also popular with cheerleaders.

 

Sex Olympics

Below is the original romance art…

↓ Transcript
WOMAN (crying): All those
years of training wasted! sex
isn’t an Olympic event!
Inked by Dick Giordano
Color by Allen Freeman

Honey, You’re Already in My End Zone

In high school, I was small for a defensive lineman–even in those pre-steroid times.

To compensate, I tried to explode across the line of scrimmage and stay really low. So low that the opposing offensive lineman couldn’t block me.

(The amazing thing about this is not that it worked so often. It’s that I did anything quickly. I’ve spent my life recovering—in slow motion—from those bursts of speed.)

Eventually, my teammates started calling me “The Mole.”

Now, as high school nicknames go–that’s not bad. I could’ve been The Leach. Or The Slug. Or even The Festering Boil.

But probably not The Stud.

↓ Transcript
SCENE: Male football player is talking to a woman.

FOOTBALL PLAYER: Really? There’s a way to score…without a football?

Incredible Hulk At Bat

Don’t throw curve ball, puny pitcher! Or Hulk smash!

↓ Transcript
SCENE: Three men talking in an office.

MAN: Sure, he’d make a great pinch hitter! But can the Incredible Hulk pass a steroids test?

Art: Dick Giordano & Vince Alascia