Goodbye Riverdale

My thanks to Black Lightning creator Tony Isabella for this alternative take on Riverdale’s red-headed heartthrob.

Art by Dick Giordano from Secrets of Young Brides #36, 1957.

 

 

Transcript:

SCENE: Diego and a crying red-head Archie look back wistfully at something off-screen.

CAPTION: As she took a last wistful look at Riverdale…she knew Diego had been right. About her and about what she felt for him. Diego mused that his life with Archie had certainly taken a wonderful turn.

CAPTION: Love is Love.

1957 Art: Dick Giordano Color: Diego Jourdan Pereira
Guest Writer: Tony Isabella

DJP.lk549

↓ Transcript
SCENE: Diego and a crying red-head Archie look back wistfully at something off-screen.

CAPTION: As she took a last wistful look at Riverdale…she knew Diego had been right. About her and about what she felt for him. Diego mused that his life with Archie had certainly taken a wonderful turn.

CAPTION: Love is Love.

1957 Art: Dick Giordano Color: Diego Jourdan Pereira
Guest Writer: Tony Isabella

DJP.lk549

Super Education

I only had time to dig out and post one of the two panels of original art. Here it is, Princess…

Art by Art Saaf & Mike Peppe from the story “Kiss and Run” in New Romances #14, 1952.

 

Transcript:

CAPTION: Sure, you’re a superhero! But that doesn’t mean you’re invulnerable to
super embarrassment!

How many times have you defeated a crazed villain and then–just moments before plunging to his death–the creep ridicules you because you don’t have a college degree?

MAN: I know it hurts…worse than an atomic wedgie! But now you can earn the respect of the scumbags you battle…with a real degree from the greatest diploma mill in the universe! Comicstown University!

SCENE: Young woman in a commencement graduation cap & gown is embraced by her father (the man from the first panel.) In the background, two older women are talking.

YOUNG WOMAN: With a degree in psychology, I can bash bad guys…and psychoanalyze them!

OLDER WOMAN #1: Wow! Fists of Fury and flaming Freudian philosophy!

OLDER WOMAN #2: That’s a super-powered combo that’ll make any villain cringe!

CAPTION: Comicstown University: We guarantee you’ll get a super education–even if you’re super dumb!

1952 Art: Art Saaf & Mike Peppe
Color–Left Panel: Diego Jourdan Perira Right Panel Color: Allen Freeman

DJP.lk298 & KissAndRun3.1

↓ Transcript
CAPTION: Sure, you’re a superhero! But that doesn’t mean you’re invulnerable to
super embarrassment!

How many times have you defeated a crazed villain and then--just moments before plunging to his death--the creep ridicules you because you don’t have a college degree?

MAN: I know it hurts...worse than an atomic wedgie! But now you can earn the respect of the scumbags you battle...with a real degree from the greatest diploma mill in the universe! Comicstown University!

SCENE: Young woman in a commencement graduation cap & gown is embraced by her father (the man from the first panel.) In the background, two older women are talking.

YOUNG WOMAN: With a degree in psychology, I can bash bad guys…and psychoanalyze them!

OLDER WOMAN #1: Wow! Fists of Fury and flaming Freudian philosophy!

OLDER WOMAN #2: That’s a super-powered combo that’ll make any villain cringe!

CAPTION: Comicstown University: We guarantee you’ll get a super education--even if you’re super dumb!

1952 Art: Art Saaf & Mike Peppe
Color--Left Panel: Diego Jourdan Perira Right Panel Color: Allen Freeman

DJP.lk298 & KissAndRun3.1

Today's Last Kiss: Nerd Necessities

Nerd Necessities

Today's Last Kiss: Nerd Necessities

1963 art by Luis Dominguez from the story “Reckless Romance” in First Kiss #30. (Scanned from the publisher’s black & white photostats of the color comic.)

 

Transcript:

PANEL #1 SCENE: Young woman talking to her parents as they start to leave the house.

CAPTION: While waiting to win the lottery, Bella Bylotta is having a hard time affording the basic necessities–rent, food, Netflix and comics! So Bella decides she either has to get a job or…

YOUNG WOMAN: …move back in with you and Mom!

DAD: Great! We’ll just sleep in the driveway so there’s room for all your comics!

MOM: After we die of hypothermia, bury us in the flower beds!

PANEL #2 SCENE: Medium closeup of the distressed daughter after her parents leave.

YOUNG WOMAN (thinks): Anger! Guilt! Sarcasm! That’s so sweet! It’s just like I never left!

1963 Art: Luis Dominguez Color: Allen Freeman

30.3.7.1-2

 

↓ Transcript
PANEL #1 SCENE: Young woman talking to her parents as they start to leave the house.

CAPTION: While waiting to win the lottery, Bella Bylotta is having a hard time affording the basic necessities--rent, food, Netflix and comics! So Bella decides she either has to get a job or...

YOUNG WOMAN: ...move back in with you and Mom!

DAD: Great! We’ll just sleep in the driveway so there’s room for all your comics!

MOM: After we die of hypothermia, bury us in the flower beds!

PANEL #2 SCENE: Medium closeup of the distressed daughter after her parents leave.

YOUNG WOMAN (thinks): Anger! Guilt! Sarcasm! That’s so sweet! It’s just like I never left!

1963 Art: Luis Dominguez Color: Allen Freeman

30.3.7.1-2


Ms. Sniff

 

Art attributed to George Tuska from the “Glory Forbes” story in Rangers Comics #22, April 1945.

 

 

Transcript:

CAPTION: At first, Shirley Smelmoor was just a hardworking deodorant model–testing the olfactory limits of the latest pit protection devised by Dismal Hygiene, Inc! But then a new, experimental deodorant is accidentally mixed with radioactive ore! (Don’t ask how! It doesn’t make sense to us either!) And Shirley becomes Ms. Sniff–the Maid of Malodorous Might!

PANEL #1: Ms. Sniff is undressing on a dock.

MS. SNIFF (thinking): Stopping that bank robbery left me smelling worse than a skunk in a cesspool!

PANEL #2: Ms. Sniff dives off the pier into the water as a bystander comments.

BYSTANDER: Hey! What reeks? Did something die?MS. SNIFF (thinking): A quick bath in Lake Fetid should do the trick!

PANEL #3: Ms. Sniff is hiding in the water below the pier as she hears voices from above.

BYSTANDER: No! It’s worse! It’s Ms. Sniff…The siren of stench!

BYSTANDER #2: Again? That putrid pariah oughta be run out of town!

MS. SNIFF (thinking): Th-that voice! It’s my date…Paul!

CAPTION: What happens next? Find out in our next sinus-scorching adventure: “I’ll love you forever…as long as you’re downwind!”

1945 Art by George Tuska Color by Lustig

MsSniffGeoTuskaColor.tif

 

↓ Transcript
CAPTION: At first, Shirley Smelmoor was just a hardworking deodorant model--testing the olfactory limits of the latest pit protection devised by Dismal Hygiene, Inc! But then a new, experimental deodorant is accidentally mixed with radioactive ore! (Don’t ask how! It doesn’t make sense to us either!) And Shirley becomes Ms. Sniff--the Maid of Malodorous Might!

PANEL #1: Ms. Sniff is undressing on a dock.

MS. SNIFF (thinking): Stopping that bank robbery left me smelling worse than a skunk in a cesspool!


PANEL #2: Ms. Sniff dives off the pier into the water as a bystander comments.

BYSTANDER: Hey! What reeks? Did something die?MS. SNIFF (thinking): A quick bath in Lake Fetid should do the trick!

PANEL #3: Ms. Sniff is hiding in the water below the pier as she hears voices from above.

BYSTANDER: No! It’s worse! It’s Ms. Sniff...The siren of stench!

BYSTANDER #2: Again? That putrid pariah oughta be run out of town!

MS. SNIFF (thinking): Th-that voice! It’s my date…Paul!

CAPTION: What happens next? Find out in our next sinus-scorching adventure: “I’ll love you forever…as long as you’re downwind!”

1945 Art by George Tuska Color by Lustig

Meow! Meow!

Art by Vince Colletta Studio from the story “The Girl Next Door” in First Kiss #3, May 1958.