Today's Last Kiss: Nerd Necessities

Nerd Necessities

Today's Last Kiss: Nerd Necessities

1963 art by Luis Dominguez from the story “Reckless Romance” in First Kiss #30. (Scanned from the publisher’s black & white photostats of the color comic.)

 

Transcript:

PANEL #1 SCENE: Young woman talking to her parents as they start to leave the house.

CAPTION: While waiting to win the lottery, Bella Bylotta is having a hard time affording the basic necessities–rent, food, Netflix and comics! So Bella decides she either has to get a job or…

YOUNG WOMAN: …move back in with you and Mom!

DAD: Great! We’ll just sleep in the driveway so there’s room for all your comics!

MOM: After we die of hypothermia, bury us in the flower beds!

PANEL #2 SCENE: Medium closeup of the distressed daughter after her parents leave.

YOUNG WOMAN (thinks): Anger! Guilt! Sarcasm! That’s so sweet! It’s just like I never left!

1963 Art: Luis Dominguez Color: Allen Freeman

30.3.7.1-2

 

↓ Transcript
PANEL #1 SCENE: Young woman talking to her parents as they start to leave the house.

CAPTION: While waiting to win the lottery, Bella Bylotta is having a hard time affording the basic necessities--rent, food, Netflix and comics! So Bella decides she either has to get a job or...

YOUNG WOMAN: ...move back in with you and Mom!

DAD: Great! We’ll just sleep in the driveway so there’s room for all your comics!

MOM: After we die of hypothermia, bury us in the flower beds!

PANEL #2 SCENE: Medium closeup of the distressed daughter after her parents leave.

YOUNG WOMAN (thinks): Anger! Guilt! Sarcasm! That’s so sweet! It’s just like I never left!

1963 Art: Luis Dominguez Color: Allen Freeman

30.3.7.1-2


Ms. Sniff

 

Art attributed to George Tuska from the “Glory Forbes” story in Rangers Comics #22, April 1945.

 

 

Transcript:

CAPTION: At first, Shirley Smelmoor was just a hardworking deodorant model–testing the olfactory limits of the latest pit protection devised by Dismal Hygiene, Inc! But then a new, experimental deodorant is accidentally mixed with radioactive ore! (Don’t ask how! It doesn’t make sense to us either!) And Shirley becomes Ms. Sniff–the Maid of Malodorous Might!

PANEL #1: Ms. Sniff is undressing on a dock.

MS. SNIFF (thinking): Stopping that bank robbery left me smelling worse than a skunk in a cesspool!

PANEL #2: Ms. Sniff dives off the pier into the water as a bystander comments.

BYSTANDER: Hey! What reeks? Did something die?MS. SNIFF (thinking): A quick bath in Lake Fetid should do the trick!

PANEL #3: Ms. Sniff is hiding in the water below the pier as she hears voices from above.

BYSTANDER: No! It’s worse! It’s Ms. Sniff…The siren of stench!

BYSTANDER #2: Again? That putrid pariah oughta be run out of town!

MS. SNIFF (thinking): Th-that voice! It’s my date…Paul!

CAPTION: What happens next? Find out in our next sinus-scorching adventure: “I’ll love you forever…as long as you’re downwind!”

1945 Art by George Tuska Color by Lustig

MsSniffGeoTuskaColor.tif

 

↓ Transcript
CAPTION: At first, Shirley Smelmoor was just a hardworking deodorant model--testing the olfactory limits of the latest pit protection devised by Dismal Hygiene, Inc! But then a new, experimental deodorant is accidentally mixed with radioactive ore! (Don’t ask how! It doesn’t make sense to us either!) And Shirley becomes Ms. Sniff--the Maid of Malodorous Might!

PANEL #1: Ms. Sniff is undressing on a dock.

MS. SNIFF (thinking): Stopping that bank robbery left me smelling worse than a skunk in a cesspool!


PANEL #2: Ms. Sniff dives off the pier into the water as a bystander comments.

BYSTANDER: Hey! What reeks? Did something die?MS. SNIFF (thinking): A quick bath in Lake Fetid should do the trick!

PANEL #3: Ms. Sniff is hiding in the water below the pier as she hears voices from above.

BYSTANDER: No! It’s worse! It’s Ms. Sniff...The siren of stench!

BYSTANDER #2: Again? That putrid pariah oughta be run out of town!

MS. SNIFF (thinking): Th-that voice! It’s my date…Paul!

CAPTION: What happens next? Find out in our next sinus-scorching adventure: “I’ll love you forever…as long as you’re downwind!”

1945 Art by George Tuska Color by Lustig

Meow! Meow!

Art by Vince Colletta Studio from the story “The Girl Next Door” in First Kiss #3, May 1958.

Siren Sex

Here’s another updated comic from the days when I did Last Kiss for Comics Buyer’s Guide. Note: The two original art panels (below) are from the same story, but were taken from different pages of that story.

Art by Vince Colletta Studio from the story “Jealousy” in First Kiss #14, 1960.

Art by Vince Colletta Studio from the story “Jealousy” in First Kiss #14, 1960.

 

Curious about the story this art comes from? You can read the entire—extremely odd—story and the rest of the vintage comic book here on the free comics site, ComicBookPlus.com.

Transcript:

CAPTION: Welcome to Comicstown–where getting bitten by a radioactive spider, cloned by aliens, and becoming an orphaned mutant are every child’s dream…and constitutional right!

SCARLET SIREN: I’m the Scarlet Siren! My super power? I turn men into…unsuspecting fools!

MAN: I find that hard to believe!

SCARLET SIREN: See! It’s working already!

1960 Art: Vince Colletta Studio Color by Allen Freeman

Art Code: 14.1.1.3 & 14.1.2.2

 

 

↓ Transcript
CAPTION: Welcome to Comicstown--where getting bitten by a radioactive spider, cloned by aliens, and becoming an orphaned mutant are every child’s dream…and constitutional right!

SCARLET SIREN: I’m the Scarlet Siren! My super power? I turn men into…unsuspecting fools!

MAN: I find that hard to believe!

SCARLET SIREN: See! It's working already!

1960 Art: Vince Colletta Studio Color by Allen Freeman

Art Code: 14.1.1.3 & 14.1.2.2