Kiss Contested

I’m going to skip showing the original art this time. Instead, let’s talk about…

The Contest

When Tony Isabella sent me the gag for today’s comic, I loved it. Until I realized—hey, picking a winner is a lot of work. And I’m super busy. (Or maybe just super lazy.)

But then I thought: Hey, Tony made “win no prize” part of the joke. Wouldn’t it be funny—or at least save me a lot of time—if I didn’t have to pick a winner?

You bet it would!

So take a gander at today’s comic and post your funniest lines in the comments below. The winner—if there is one—will be the person that gets the most friends (or total strangers) to comment and something nice about their submission. Submit as many as you like.

Now, let the quips begin!

Happy Yom Kippur?

Although my father’s side of the family is Jewish, I was brought up Christian (Presbyterian actually.) So my understanding of Yom Kippur isn’t from first hand experience.
I hope I got it right. More than that, I hope this comic is funny!

Art by John Tartaglione from the story “My Confidence Man” in FIRST KISS #5, 1958.

 

Transcript:

SCENE: Man and woman, almost cheek to cheek. The man looks sad. The woman looks on with an expression that shows concern, but seems to say that she knows something that the man doesn’t.

MAN: I can’t think of a Yom Kippur idea for today’s comic! I feel so guilty! I-I can’t even eat!

WOMAN: Guilt? Hunger? Congrats! That’s the essence of every Yom Kippur joke ever told! So…

MAN: Success!

2020 Last Kiss Inc
1958 Art: John Tartaglione New Color: Diego Jourdan Pereira

DJP.lk338
FK16.5.4.5

↓ Transcript
SCENE: Man and woman, almost cheek to cheek. The man looks sad. The woman looks on with an expression that shows concern, but seems to say that she knows something that the man doesn't.

MAN: I can’t think of a Yom Kippur idea for today’s comic! I feel so guilty! I-I can’t even eat!

WOMAN: Guilt? Hunger? Congrats! That’s the essence of every Yom Kippur joke ever told! So...

MAN: Success!

2020 Last Kiss Inc
1958 Art: John Tartaglione New Color: Diego Jourdan Pereira

DJP.lk338
FK16.5.4.5

The New Sexretary

I think if you’re office has deep purple walls, it’s a pretty good tip that something funny is going on.

Kissing? Sure, why not?

I mean, you’d have to keep your eyes shut just to keep from going blind or crazy in that room. So you might as well be kissing while you’re in there with your eyes closed!

Art by Vince Colletta Studio from the story “Office Party” in FIRST KISS #16, 1960.

 

 

Transcript:

SCENE: A brunette opens an office door and discovers a man and a woman (a redhead) kissing inside.

BRUNETTE: Oh, dear! I see you’ve already picked a secretary!

REDHEAD (thinking): I can get paid for this? Cool!

1960 Art: Vince Colletta Studio New Color: Allen Freeman

16.5.4.5

↓ Transcript
SCENE: A brunette opens an office door and discovers a man and a woman (a redhead) kissing inside.

BRUNETTE: Oh, dear! I see you’ve already picked a secretary!

REDHEAD (thinking): I can get paid for this? Cool!

1960 Art: Vince Colletta Studio New Color: Allen Freeman

16.5.4.5

A Bad Case of Girl Flu?

This is a sort of sequel to Monday’s comic. Both use art and characters created by the great J.R. Williams in his early 20th century comic strip Out Our Way.

My thanks to Ron Evry and Bruce Simon for permission to use art from their collections of Williams’ work. This one from is from: Hoo-Hah! Out Our Way – Born Thirty Years Too Soon

Comic (circa 1920s-’30s) by J.R. William. Reprinted from Bruce Simon’s & Ron Evry’s book: Hoo-Hah! Out Our Way: Born Thirty Years Too Soon. Used with permission.

 

 

Transcript:

SCENE: Boy in bed looking miserable.

OFF-PANEL VOICE #1: What’s wrong with him? Got the flu?

OFF-PANEL VOICE #2: Worse! Suzy said she “likes” him! He’s trying to decide if he likes her back!

Vintage Art: J.R. Williams New Dialogue: John Lustig
Art from Bruce Simon’s & Ron Evry’s book:
Hoo-Hah! Out Our Way: Born Thirty Years Too Soon

ART: Born Thirty Years Too Soon-0068

↓ Transcript
SCENE: Boy in bed looking miserable.

OFF-PANEL VOICE #1: What’s wrong with him? Got the flu?

OFF-PANEL VOICE #2: Worse! Suzy said she “likes” him! He’s trying to decide if he likes her back!

Vintage Art: J.R. Williams New Dialogue: John Lustig
Art from Bruce Simon’s & Ron Evry’s book:
Hoo-Hah! Out Our Way: Born Thirty Years Too Soon

ART: Born Thirty Years Too Soon-0068

Suzy’s Dog

Early this year, I ran across several books put together by Bruce Simon and Ron Evry. And I quickly fell in love.

Uh, not with Bruce and Ron—although they’re both great guys—but rather with their books collecting the Out Our Way cartoons of James R. Williams.

The art has fantastic line work. And, despite—or maybe even because of—the antiquated subject matter, I was anxious to see if I could turn some of the art into Last Kiss comics.

My thanks to Bruce and Ron for permission to use panels from their books. This first one is from Hoo-Hah! Out Our Way: Born Thirty Years Too Soon.

On Wednesday I’ll be running a sequel to today’s Last Kiss gag. In coming weeks, you’ll occasionally see more Williams art here. I hope you enjoy it—as well as Williams original gags.

Comic (circa 1920s-’30s) by J.R. William. Reprinted from Bruce Simon’s & Ron Evry’s book: Hoo-Hah! Out Our Way: Born Thirty Years Too Soon. Used with permission.

 

 

Transcript:

SCENE: Two boys in a bedroom. Boy #1 is on the bed, but is peaking out the window. Boy #2 is in bed and trying (without any luck) to sleep.

BOY #1: Suzy’s at her window…looking at me! I hate when girls look at me!

BOY #2: Suzy’s gone! She’s visiting her aunt.* That must be Suzy’s dog.

BOY #1: Her dog? Emily? But…she’s a girl too! It’s a conspiracy! They’re all out to marry me!

CAPTION: *Suzy’s Aunt lives in Girlville!

Vintage Art: J.R. Williams New Dialogue: John Lustig
Art from Bruce Simon’s & Ron Evry’s book:
Hoo-Hah! Out Our Way: Born Thirty Years Too Soon

ART: Born Thirty Years Too Soon-0146

↓ Transcript
SCENE: Two boys in a bedroom. Boy #1 is on the bed, but is peaking out the window. Boy #2 is in bed and trying (without any luck) to sleep.

BOY #1: Suzy’s at her window...looking at me! I hate when girls look at me!

BOY #2: Suzy’s gone! She’s visiting her aunt.* That must be Suzy’s dog.

BOY #1: Her dog? Emily? But...she’s a girl too! It’s a conspiracy! They’re all out to marry me!

CAPTION: *Suzy’s Aunt lives in Girlville!

Vintage Art: J.R. Williams New Dialogue: John Lustig
Art from Bruce Simon’s & Ron Evry’s book:
Hoo-Hah! Out Our Way: Born Thirty Years Too Soon

ART: Born Thirty Years Too Soon-0146