This message brought to you by Frank the Overly Friendly Florist. Frank’s motto:

“Diamonds are forever, but flowers cost (slightly) less. So buy now before they all wilt and we have to throw them out!”

Major discounts available to anyone foolish enough to send us a blank check! Act now before you come to your senses!

↓ Transcript
SCENE: Woman holding eight roses that have just arrived. Man in foreground looking concerned.

WOMAN: Eight roses? sweet! But I still won’t sleep with you!

MAN: I knew I should've bought a dozen!

Art by Vince Colletta Studio